Review: Cafe

Butlers Cafe

Yes, this is a cafe where you get served tea and sweets by English speaking foreign butlers. I'm sure if you're a Japanese lady you would think this is very dashing and all, but this place gave me the worst case of the giggles since being in 3rd grade and being unable to laugh at a picture of a piece of coral that looked like a butt with three cheeks.

The fact that this cafe is located in Shibuya should probably indicate to you that this place isn't primarily aimed at the yaoi doujinshi reading/talking to yourself crowd. It's pretty solidly in Shibuya proper and the clientele look like they all either just came from or are planning to go to 109 (which is exactly what I did afterwards. DON'T JUDGE ME). The interior is pretty small, but the decor is very rose-infested-lolita-garden, which I'm sure is what most people like. The food and tea was pretty standard butler cafe quality - not as good as Swallowtail but not as bad as regular maid cafes. Overall, I'd say any place aimed at women won't disappoint in tea variety/quality

and desserts.

Now, here's the thing. These butlers all speak to you in English, as you may have guessed, and that's fine and dandy. BUT THEY CALL YOU 'MY PRINCESS' ALL. THE. TIME. And as soon as you come in? They put a freakin' tiara on your head. I don't know about you, but that was awkward max. I felt less like princess from a disney movie and more like the cover of Hole's Live Through This. There were two butlers on duty that day: Elliot and Joseph. Elliot was from Canadian and took being a butler v. seriously as he never broke character no matter what we said to him. He also pronounced English words in a Japanese way even though it was pretty clear to him we were native English speakers? Joseph asked us to guess where he was based on his accent, and unfortunately we guessed wrong because Americans Know Geography. I asked him point blank whether or not it was awkward to call everyone "my princess" and he replied "not at all!" with a bit of sarcasm. There was also a Japanese guy working there, but he mostly took the backset unless someone really had no idea what any of the white butlers were saying. This poor guy tried to explain to us the menu in his heavily accented accent until I told him to just use Japanese.

The highlight of the entire trip was when someone ordered a cinderella special or whatever it was called. They turn off all the lights and the Jap

anese butler runs in with a treasure box and commence a little play, which I shall to the best of my abilities try to recreate here:

Butler1: "MY BUTLER! MY BUTLER"
Butler2: "What is it, my butler?"
Butler1: "Yes, my butler, the prince is in town and he wants to find a certain special princess who will fit in this glass shoe (opens treasure box)"
Butler2: "Oh yes, my butler, then we must find her."

HOW MANY TIMES ARE YOU GOING TO CALL EACH OTHER 'MY BUTLER,' I CANNOT EVEN DEAL WITH IT. All the Japanese girls were swooning with stars in their eyes and here I was, in the middle of the room in my gothic leopard t-shirt and cut-off shirts laughing uncontrollably. Just when you think they would stop calling each other "my butler" they would DO IT AGAIN. You know when you laugh so hard that you stop making sound/stop breathing? Yeah, I laughed that hard. I was cryin'
They make rounds thro

ugh the cafe asking each customer whether the shoe was theirs (what would they do if some troll said yes?) and finally they "find" their cinderella (the chick who just dropped $20 some bucks) and give her some drink in a glass slipper & more deluxe tiara.

After I calmed down by thinking of the most tragic things known to man, Joseph came by and asked us where we were going afterwards. I just say, "shopping" and he kind of gives me a knowing smile and asks, "by any chance would you be going to 109?"

YOU GOT ME JOSEPH.

Anyways, would we go to this place again? Probably not, unless we're being paid to blog about it. Obviously, you need zero Japanese skills to go and "enjoy" this cafe, but unless you appreciate the camp this place offers, you might even wish you didn't know English. Whatever, I'm not hating on this place - I'd actually recommend for you to go once just so you get a chance to see the Cinderella special skit. A++++ would see again. No, scratch that - go so you can have one of the butlers princess carry you and take a picture of it.

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